Friday, September 23, 2011

Top 10 Stag Night Activities in the UK

Right let’s
take a look at some proper great ‘blokey’ ideas for stag night activities in the UK! There’ll be no spas, art galleries, shopping, museums or any of that clap trap in this list – just high testosterone adrenaliny stuff for blokes to do together (but not that close together!) on a great weekend to see off a mate.

1 - Karting and Dodgems and Supercars

Let’s start with a great favourite of any group of lads, karting which is generally pretty accessible and low cost so everyone can come along and get REALLY COMPETETIVE! There is no excuse to come last without having had at least one spin a lap. But karting can be a little ‘soft’ so how about upping the ante and trying ‘Dodgems for Grown Ups’ – full on stock car and banger car racing in numerous locations throughout the UK. But let’s face it, wild and extreme as they are stock cars on a tight circuit are unlikely to break the 70mph ‘illegal barrier’, and you cant’s be telling all your mates how fast you went if it was below 70! So how about taking to the track in some real hairy chested medallion melting metal from Ferrari, Lamborghini (practise the spelling before you email your experiences to your mates – they’ll only take the piss if you get it wrong!), Aston and the likes.

2 - Tank Driving and Tank Paintball

Smashing things up in Tanks – what could be more blokey than that? Well possibly, and the jury is still out on this one,
roaring up in a tank, jumping out
of it ‘full SAS style’ and shooting people. Tank Paintball has to be pretty high up on the stag scale of ‘ard activities’.

3 - Segway Racing and Dirty Days Out

Segway racing, and playing in muddy dykes might not sound too blokey, but it has made number three on our list on the strength of the picture of Suzi Perry wrestling in the mud. Ooops - giving away my age a bit there. Good dirty mucking about fun.

4 - Pedal Powered Pub Crawls

Ring the missus and tell her you are cycling around London on a cultural tour with your buddies, how could this possibly upset her! The amazing Pedal Pub allows you and your mates to pedal and booze your way around the capital. Back of the net!

5 - Lets Off Road

More man fun, with petrol. Getting out into the wilds, and crashing about in a rufty tufty Land Rover is great bonding material. With tales of near impossible angles, deep river crossings and mates lost in the woods (possibly tied or hand cuffed to trees naked – “now why was that necessary?” she’ll ask!). Of if you want to go real big and have top pub bragging rights, how about playing in a monster truck, and of course using it to break things!

6 - Bushcraft and Survival

Why not really ‘man up’ and go with your mates to learn bushcraft - camping, sleeping rough in your own man made tent, trapping and skinning rabbits for tea, doing what bears do in the woods, etc.

7 - Skiing, Ice Climbing or fishing!

Or do something cool – indoor skiing is pretty popular, and fun. Proving your skills against your rivals (ooops mates!) and every chance of a manly limb in plaster after this one. Or get high and cool on an ice climbing session. Men verses icy mountains. Or if this is too cool, how about geting wet and cool on a fishing trip in the gale lashes seas around the Bristih Isles – catch supper! This would be a good one to do (assuming you catch anything edible) before the bushcraft!

8 - High Ropes Adventures

Or relive your childhood by going climbing trees at one of the many high rope adventures in the UK. No chickening out of the big jumps and high zip wires, or ‘what went on in the high ropes’ is unlikely to ‘stay in the high ropes’ when home and in the pub!

9 - Mountain Biking

Great chance of getting into the wilds and showing of your downhill skills and getting big air on the jumps. Good chance to take the mickey out of the less fit competitors (oops again – mates) with you on the trip! And a good chance of some hero plaster for the return trip!

10 - Manchester Curry Mile

And what could be more manly that doing the length of Manchester’s Curry Mile – booze and curry, loads and loads of curry.

Where’s the golf?

Now I know a lot of people go on golfing stag weekends, here in Spain where I live the bars are full of gangs of drunk golf bores, but it’s not on this list, it did not even make the top 156, as its for old people who wear knitted wool jumpers. There no getting muddy, engines to blow up, likelihood of getting a good scar or a limb in plaster, so along with rugby, which is played by blokes who hug each other tightly far more often than is healthy, it’s not on the list! Get over it!

Don’t forget the main man’s mankini, hand cuffs, etc.

Have fun! And if she asks it wasn’t me who suggested that!

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